Me first…

Me first… Me first… Me first.

‘First’ is an important, impossible issue in our house. Here are the things I have said to try to mitigate this problem;

Sometimes you have to wait.

You are not always last.

Your sister is not always first.

Being last can be good.

Patience is a useful thing to learn.

You are first sometimes.

It might feel like you are always last, but it’s not the case.

Is that how it feels? (This is usually met with ‘That isn’t how it feels, that is how it is.’

I know it feels that way. (‘No you don’t!’)

I am last, not you.

Shall we make sure you go first next time?

Shall we take it in terms to be first?

Shall we have a ‘Anna first’ day today and a ‘Sam first’ day tomorrow?

I’m going to start writing it down, to keep a record, so I know everything is fair.

I have started writing it down, to keep a record, and I know everything is fair. (This is a lie.)

Next time you can be first.

Too bad. (You can scroll to the end, if you’re bored. I did warn you I had no pearls of wisdom.)

You were not last this morning.

You were not last yesterday.

You were first this morning.

You were first yesterday.

You will all get a turn.

Your turn will come.

Are you sure? I thought you were first last time.

I used to have the same argument when I was a kid.

Someone has to be first and this time, it’s not you, but another time it will be you.

So, as you can see, ‘first’ is an important, impossible issue in our house. I have not been able to mitigate the problem at all.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!